Stanley Cup and Cheesecake 2008

My Stanley Cup Playoff picks didn't exactly set the world on fire in terms of debate and comments last April, but they were a lot of fun to do! So, here's this year's serving of hockey picks and cheesecake!

Also, I should note that my Stanley Cup Finals prediction of Sharks vs. Penguins, made on video last October as the season was just getting underway and both teams were in the tank, is looking mighty smart now, if all the experts are to be believed.

(1) Montreal Canadiens vs. (8) Boston Bruins

The Habs owned the Bruins all year, going a perfect 8-0 against them in the season series. And Montreal dominated those games, outscoring Boston 39-16. They might win a game, I can't see a way Boston avoids getting steamrolled. Which, since they're from Boston, I would find hilarious. Canadiens in five.

(2) Pittsburgh Penguins vs. (7) Ottawa Senators

These teams meet again in the first round for the second straight year. Last year I underestimated the veteran Sens, and they went out and thrashed the Pens in five games on the way to the finals where they lost to the Ducks. This is a different Ottawa team, however, almost choked their way out of the playoffs entirely after an amazing start to the season. Their best player is hurt, they've got one goalie who's a nutjob and another who's not very good, and are generally going in the wrong direction. Conversely, the young Penguins have weathered their first playoffs and the disappointment that comes with losing, are finally healthy and and are getting spectacular play from netminder Marc-Andre Fleury. You'd think I would have learned some humility after picking the Pens in six last April and being completely wrong, but I'm going to fly in the face of superstition and pick the Penguins in five.

(3) Washington Capitals vs. (6) Philadelphia Flyers

This is a toughie, as both of these teams were on the outside of the playoffs looking in just a short while ago. The Capitals are flying high right now, wresting the division title from the Carolina Hurricanes in their final game of the season, while the Flyers rebounded from being the worst team in the NHL last year. Washington has all-everything superstar Alex Ovechkin, while Philly has a lot of no-names whose game plan is to break the ankles of the other teams best player. Trouble is, sometimes it actually works. I'm not gonna lie to you...I hate both these teams...but I hate the Caps a lot less, so I'm gonna pick them to win it. Capitals in seven.

(4) New Jersey Devils vs. (5) New York Rangers

If you're having trouble sleeping, why not skip the Ambien and tune into this series, which promises to be a complete snooze. Both teams have great goaltenders, play stiff, choking defence, and can't score for shit. The Rangers won seven of eight games against the Devils this season, but unlike the Canadiens/Bruins matchups, the games were very close, with several having to be decided in overtime. I give the nod to New York 'cause they have more ex-Penguins, and because they're just slightly less horrid offensively than New Jersey. Rangers in six.

(1) Detroit Red Wings vs. (8) Nashville Predators

This one might not be the cakewalk it appears to be for the Red Wings, who amassed more points than any other team this season. Nashville is in the same division as the Wings, and played them tough in eight regular-season meetings. In the end, though, I expect Detroit's star-studded lineup to win out. Also, if the Preds win, chances improve that I'll have to hear someone use the exceedingly annoying term "Nash Vegas". Red Wings in six.

(2) San Jose Sharks vs. (7) Calgary Flames

It sucks having my two favorite Western Conference teams meet up in the first round, as it means one of them will be eliminated early...but it oughta be awfully entertaining while it lasts. Cal-gary's good, but the Sharks are on an absolute tear, having won something like 19 of their last 20. I don't think the Flames can keep up. Sharks in six.

(3) Minnesota Wild vs. (6) Colorado Avalanche

The only two teams in the playoffs with singular names face off in what figures to be a pretty even series. That's what I've read, anyway...I've only seen maybe one period of a Wild or Avs game all season. I've gone back and forth several times just while writing this paragraph, but I think I'll go with the Avalanche- no, the Wild in seven.

(4) Anaheim Ducks vs. (5) Dallas Stars

I don't really care much for the Dallas Stars...in fact, I have problems with the whole concept of Texas. But I flatly refuse to draw those lameass, shitass Ducks jerseys. They actually redesigned them over the summer to fit the new RBK Edge jersey template...and this is all they came up with? Makes me nostalgic for this. Anyway, screw 'em...they're ugly. Oh, and their captain, Chris Pronger, is a turd. Stars in seven.


Keath said...

I can't decide which is better about the playoffs - the games or the fab drawings herein. Outstanding!

Unknown said...

You're breakin' my heart Ullman, I always told myself that someday, you would draw a Ducks girl and when that moment happened, I would tattoo your fine Ducks girl drawing on me. This was my opportunity and you flatly refuse. You're breakin' my heart man... :-)

Jay Geldhof said...

This could almost get me interested in Hockey.

000 said...

Damn the Sharks. Keeping me from seeing a Calgary cutie. All the reason to root against them. Go Flames Go!

semper_ubi_sub_ubi said...

As someone who found out about your website through uniwatch I must say that I approve of the reason why you picked the Stars to beat the Ducks.

Robert Ullman said...

I realize the Stars have less than a snowball's chance in hell (especially with Sergei Zubov out), but I had to do it. Sorry, Brian. Maybe in Round Two!

Randy, it broke my heart, as I love those Flames jerseys...but I hadda go with the Sharks! But hey, I picked 'em last year!

Dear Lord Stanley said...

So close! I've been wanting to see an Avalanche jersey girl from you forever, and yet still no dice.

I guess I'll just have to survive somehow.

Robert Ullman said...

Dang! Could I have picked the West any worse?

Anonymous said...

For not liking the Caps, you sure did right by us! Too bad that when we win the series, we'll likely play the Pens...and we all know who you'll be drawing for that one!

Unknown said...

Great drawings! What were all those words in between?

J.K.E. said...

Your blog is now the only reason I want the Lightning to make the playoffs next season.

Robert Ullman said...

Well, with the first round nearing its penultimate few games, I'm 3-1, with the Penguins (in four games, I guessed five), Rangers (five, I guessed six) and Red Wings (I was dead on with six) advancing. Only the Wild let me down, losing to the Avs in six games (should'a stayed with my first pick). These were the easy ones, pretty easy picks to make. If the Stars beat and eliminate the Ducks tonight, however, I'm gonna look like a hockey genius!

Robert Ullman said...

Fuckin' Caps. Way to blow it and make a liar outta me...not to mention eliminating the possibility that I might be able to sit in a luxury box for one of the playoff games in nearby D.C. (had the Capitals won, they would've played Pittsburgh)! Oh well, at least I won't have to listen to those retards who call Caps games for Comcast SportsNet again until October!